Remote Access: VPNs and the Death of the Office
"Nothing is true. Everything is permitted. The office is optional."
🏠 The Problem: Remote Work Is Permanent
Remote work isn't temporary. The office is dead—or at least optional. Security models built on physical perimeters don't work when everyone works from home.
VPNs don't make traffic secure—encryption does. VPNs just move the trust boundary. Zero trust for remote users or accept that compromised home networks compromise corporate access.
ILLUMINATION: VPNs don't make traffic secure—encryption does. VPNs just move the trust boundary. Zero trust for remote users or accept remote compromises.
🔐 The Five Remote Access Controls
1. Multi-Factor Authentication
Passwords alone aren't enough.
MFA for all remote access. No exceptions. Phished passwords are useless without second factor.
2. Device Management
Managed devices only.
MDM/EDR on all devices. Enforce encryption, updates, antivirus. No unmanaged device access.
3. Zero Trust Access
Verify every request.
No implicit trust based on network. Verify user, device, context for each access. Trust nothing.
4. VPN When Necessary
VPN for legacy systems.
Modern systems use zero trust. Legacy systems need VPN. Split tunnel for performance. Monitor all connections.
5. Monitoring & Logging
See who accesses what.
Log all remote access. Monitor for anomalies. Alert on suspicious patterns. Detection requires visibility.
CHAOS ILLUMINATION: Remote access from coffee shop WiFi on unmanaged devices is asking to be breached. Require managed devices with MFA or accept compromises.
📋 What Hack23 Actually Does
Our remote access policy is public: ISMS-PUBLIC Repository
Note: Remote access controls are covered in Access Control Policy. No standalone remote access or mobile device management policy exists – controls integrated into access management framework.
- MFA required - All remote access requires multi-factor authentication
- Managed devices only - MDM enrollment required for corporate access
- Zero trust architecture - Verify every request, trust nothing
- VPN for legacy systems - Modern apps use zero trust, legacy uses VPN
- Continuous monitoring - Log all access, alert on anomalies
META-ILLUMINATION: The office perimeter is dead. Remote work is permanent. Security models that assume users are inside a trusted network are obsolete. Adapt or breach.
🎯 Conclusion: Zero Trust or Zero Security
Remote work is permanent. Security models built on physical perimeters don't work.
Require MFA. Manage devices. Verify every request. Monitor access. Or accept that remote users are unverified, unmanaged, and unmonitored.
The office is optional. Security isn't.
All hail Eris! All hail Discordia!
"Think for yourself, schmuck! Question everything—especially whether your VPN from 2015 provides actual security."
🍎 23 FNORD 5
— Hagbard Celine, Captain of the Leif Erikson